Gordon (over at Spacecheese), has been talking about his friends getting married: “Yo La Tengo’s “Center of Gravity” was the new couple’s song.”

Do yourself a favor, guys (and gals). Don’t have a song. If you feel you must ignore my advice, at least do yourself the kindness of picking something that no one ever plays on the radio. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to pick something you don’t even own on CD. Having “a song” ruins it, and “having a song” that you hear all the time is even worse. Consider:

Every time that song plays, your spouse will look at you and smile, reaching for your hand, and you will smile, staring abstractly into space with your mouth quietly quirked while you pretend to be reminiscing about the first time you heard the song together, or the time you heard it and decided it was ‘your’ song, or when you danced to it at your wedding, or something.

What you’re really thinking: you just want to sing along with the damn song and have it not mean anything, but if you sing along now, you have to be singing to them, and god help you if you’re feeling a little silly and make up some stupid lyrics in the middle. Blasphemy.

The song isn’t fun anymore. You ruined it. (Meanwhile, you spouse is gritting her teeth because EVERY TIME the song comes on, she has to smile and reach for your hand, even if she was doing something else.)

Eventually, you hate the song. Avoid this if you can. I’m not anti-romantic, but I like a little separation between my memory and my music - and it’s worse when the memories come upon you, not unbidden, but thrust on you unwillingly - there is no romance there.