That soft, whispering sigh that rides the air tonight, all across the America?

That’s the sound of a million Trek fans drifting through a greased-up-Vulcan masturbatory fantasy while they stare at a couple seconds of Enterprise in freeze-frame.

Good show? Yes, I enjoyed parts of it very much. Cool ship? Yes. It felt like a sub, it was cramped like a sub, and in case you missed the parallel, they used reverse depth charges to attack it like a sub.

Pandering, pointless lotion scene? …you do hear that sound, don’tcha?

The lowest common denominator in Trekdom is divisible by 7 and 9.