So, yesterday, Justin got sent to his room and his bed at around 3:30 in the afternoon. A few ploys designed to allow him to get back up aside, that’s where he stayed until this morning.

Let me preface this by saying that Justin is on Christmas break for this week and the next. After that he’s back in classes and things at least change if not get easier.

When he’s on break he basically has the run of the house. Gasp or groan however you like, but at his age and with our rules, this basically works for us: he can go out into the fenced backyard, the dogs are there with him, the doors are locked, he knows all our phone numbers by heart (certainly isn’t afraid to dial 911, even by accident :P), the front shades are drawn, and he almost never tries to burn the house down. Considering that people use 13-year-olds to babysit their kids, I figure a twelve year old can keep from choking on a christmas ornament from 8 to 3, minus my lunch break. It works.

Now, I acknowledge that the kid’s on break and he should certainly be allowed to screw around and do what he likes, but we do like it if he does a few things during the day: don’t make the house any messier than it is, pick up dirty dishes you see (or create) and load them into the washer. Run some laundry. Play with the dogs, please. Et cetera.

We call them ‘chores’. (Internally, I refer to them as ‘Stuff I wish I’d known I should do when I got to college’.)

If he gets the chores done (he can do whatever when he’s not doing something on the list, though we suggest doing some reading and sometimes I leave a few math worksheets there), and the evening is usually full of fun stuff to do (lately, this means going to the pool at the rec center for an hour or two). He generally understands the Exchange of Service for Goody-Goody concept but since we got back from SoDak, of course, he doesn’t see why he has to do anything but drain the batteries in his toys and play Diablo II.

So this morning he gets up and I explain that if he’s not going to listen to our requests, we’re very simply not going to listen to his — if we get home and the house looks the worse for wear he goes to bed right then so we can do the things we’ve earned the right to do by virtue of working our butts off all day. If it looks like he did his little things around the house then we do those things with him; if not, well, that sucks for all of us, but I’ll get over it. What happened in the evening was pretty much all up to him.

Then I took off for work. Awhile later he called and asked me where [Item] needed to go — he was cleaning the kitchen table off, you see.

You. Go.

I was about to say "You go, guy!" But somebody beat me to it.

Well at least he got to miss a really bad Buffy last night.

One odd thing is that everytime I've seen him, he must've been on his best behavior. But it is good good to see that he's willing to what nees to be done.

Neat.

That's what you get, Dave, for making me do your car shopping for you.

It *was* a bad Buffy, wasn't it? Still means it's better than 96% of everything else that's on tv though...

Boulder Dude - All of the times we've seen him, he's already had plenty of time to do the wind down from the trip home.

Doyce - does it at least get a little easier after every year you go back? I mean its not like you have to start from scratch again is it?? (I hope)

The best part about Buffy last night was the ending, I was so glad she finally rescued Spike.

Hugs

Actually, Jackie and I enjoyed the Buffy last night -- in parts.

The timing on all the line delivery was really weird, though. And a disappointing final fight.

Really liked Spike at the end, though.

Yeah, the stuff you need to know how to do when you get to college is a good basic skill set.

So. Does he show any interest in cooking, even the basics?

Nothing quite impresses a date in college like a decent plate of speghetti, salad, and garlic bread... prepared by a guy.

He might not be ready to think about that now...

I'm with Doyce -- Buffy had some moments. 24 was a lot better though.

Actually, yeah. He can (and does) make mac and cheese, pizza, pizza rolls, and other stove-and-saucepan-related stuff. He can read and follow box directions with the best of em.

Nice, solid parenting type stuff, man. Good for you, and good for him for being able to "take a hint."

Gee, it's amazing what can happen when you're involved with your kids and actually work things through with them. Not to mention follow through on punishments, even if it's just the curtailment of playtime. (We were at a school function recently. I'll spare you folks the rant...)

Again, nice work.

The scary part for me is the fact that I seem to be adopting your parenting style. Sean might not like it, but at my house dirty dishes go by the sink, make your bed when you get dressed and pick up your toys when you finish playing. That's all really. I'm starting slow, but we're working up to more. So far Troy hasn't told me to stop.